


Freedom

by MoreThanAGame



Category: Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-01-23
Updated: 2014-02-19
Packaged: 2018-01-09 19:33:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 8,939
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1149949
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MoreThanAGame/pseuds/MoreThanAGame
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Katniss and Peeta leave Panem after the war is over and try their odds in the wild.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

After Peeta came home from the Capitol and planted the Primroses he had tried to go on with life in District 12. He tried several approaches. His normal approach of kindness and community, Haymitch's of drinking and anger, and the one Katniss had employed of detachment and depression. One night when he was using Haymitch's strategy, passed out on his kitchen table, Katniss stormed into his house, pouring cold water over his head.

  
'Whhaat the fuck!!' he sputtered, rolling off the table to the floor. 'Ow!!' His right arm took most of the impact and he rubbed it before the beginnings of a hangover headache kicked in and stole his attention. They glared at each other for a while before Katniss broke the silence. There was a fire in her eyes Peeta hadn't seen since the war. 'I'm leaving. I'm heading south. I'm leaving Panem and never looking back.' His stomach turned to knots and he sobered up immediately, head swimming with fear of never seeing her again before she said the words that would change the rest of his life. 'I want you to come with me.'

  
They had both come to the conclusion that there was no life for them in Panem worth living. There were too many memories, too much pain. The past loomed over them like a vulture circling to consume what remained. For weeks they planned and secretly acquired all that they would need. They were careful to go unnoticed and not bring any attention to what they were doing.

  
When the departure day arrived they stood at the fence, shoulder to shoulder, carrying only the barest of essentials and the most prized of their possessions. Katniss held on her person her father's bow and quiver of arrows, 2 knives, a flint, a change of clothes, extra socks, Prim's comb, fishing string, a bottle of iodine, a bit of food, her herb book and game bag. She wore a green shirt and loose brown leather pants from Cinna's pile that seemed to be the sturdiest and most practical of the clothes in the house. She wore brown leather boots that were thick yet light and completely waterproofed. On her belt was a canteen of water and rope. Her father's hunting jacket donned her shoulders, and deep in one of the hidden pockets was her parents' wedding picture and Peeta's pearl.

  
Peeta wore a brown long sleeve shirt and a beige waterproof jacket. His pants were chocolate brown and on his belt he also had a canteen of water, rope and a knife. He carried 2 cooking pots, a sleeping bag they had made out of blankets and durable plastic, a flint, axe, a change of clothes, and a map they had found in the remains of the school basement. The map was marked up with circles and lines from late nights of planning. Inside one of Peeta's pockets were 3 items he hadn't told Katniss about and didn't plan on revealing until the proper timing.

  
For a moment Katniss felt like she was standing on the arena platform, clock counting down, holding her breath, adrenaline pumping, and everything, her entire existence dependent on that first step forward. Their future containing only a spark of hope. The thing that made all the difference was choice.  
They passed through the fence silently and it was like a dark cloud receding to reveal the sky, wide and open. Finally, they were free.


	2. Chapter 2

Katniss wasn't going to let one more person tell her how to live. She had given Panem everything she had and they had taken it like she owed it to them. Her life had been treated like a play, her heart song molded and twisted into an anthem, they took it all away and made it their own until there was nothing left of Katniss Everdeen. All that remained of her was the woods. In the wild Katniss was at home. It had always been the place where the Capitol could not touch her and now that she and Peeta had left it would never touch her again.

When she had decided to leave, Peeta was the first to fill her thoughts. He was the only one who understood what it was like to lose everything. He knew what it was like for everyone to want you dead. The thought of going without him made her chest get tight and it was like the floor would drop out from under her.

The only time Peeta had spent in the woods was when he had been in the arena. Katniss had expected fear and reluctance from him, but he hadn't shown any of that. Instead, he seemed relieved and even a little excited.

The day they crossed over the fence the spring sun was just beginning to rise. The air was still cool in the mornings, and the spring breeze gave Katniss goosebumps on her neck. She zipped up her jacket and shifted the weight of her pack as they climbed a large hill. They had not yet spoken but when they reached the top of the hill Peeta broke the silence with a gasp. 'It's beautiful.' He marveled, taking in the valley before them. A river wound through the bottom of the valley and trees dusted the hills on the other side of the river. On their hill leading down to the river were hundreds of dandelions as if they were leading the way, beckoning Katniss to move forward and have hope.

Peeta had never seen anything so naturally beautiful. Everything was gray in District 12 and in the Capitol everything had been so unnaturally colored, cold and sharp. Here the colors were vibrant and everything looked invitingly soft and playful. He had the urge to roll down the hill, to feel it with his whole body, become part of what he was looking at. Peeta could sit here for hours and draw, he cursed himself for not making room in his pack for his paints. He realized Katniss was watching him and began to feel a little self conscious but then he offered her a toothy grin and it must have looked ridiculous because Katniss laughed. It felt so good to hear her laugh, he had forgotten what it sounded like.

'Let's find a good place to cross this river and follow it as far south as we can like we talked about. We should stay by the water as often as possible, we will keep it in view but I want to get into the tree cover. Animals will be coming to the river to drink, it's best if we keep a bit of distance.' Peeta gave her a nod and they pushed on.

They had learned in school that the ocean had risen plunging most of the world outside of Panem underwater but Katniss had a suspicion that the Capitol had lied to them. It could be the same as the way the Capitol had kept the districts isolated from each other. They could be walking into anything but Katniss was not going to take the Capitol's word. She wanted to see it for herself.

Her time with Peeta so far had been almost professional in nature. They only spoke of plans and survival strategy and had kept each other at a distance. She wondered if he trusted her at all, but he must if he came, right? It was going to be a hard journey if he didn't so she vowed to bring it up when they made camp.

By the time they reached the river the sun was high in the sky. They put down their packs and took some sips from their canteens. They sat on a boulder to catch their breath and rest. They needed to get to the other side of the river. It had the trees they needed for shelter and to make a fire. Also, she needed to hunt. They had decided mornings would be for travel and afternoons would be for setting up camp and hunting and gathering. After the short break, they continued down the river for a few more hours but had not found a lull in the river. The sun was getting lower and it was time to accept that a crossing wasn't going to happen today. 'Let's find some higher ground and make a fire with some of this driftwood.' With their arms full of driftwood they decided to make camp against a group of boulders and just hope it didn't rain. Luckily the sky was clear and rain seemed improbable.

Peeta made the fire while Katniss searched the meadows for rabbit but had no luck. She set up a snare though and planned to check it in the morning. They sat by the fire sipping from their canteens and eating a bit of their food stuffs but being very careful to ration it. They'd be going to sleep hungry tonight and without shelter. Not a great start.

The sun set quickly and they were soon enveloped in darkness. They watched each other nervously across the fire. 'This is a fresh start, Peeta. I know we will never forget what has happened in the past and we probably will never fully understand it all but let's just agree that most of what we think we know are lies. We only have each other now and it's time to let go of the past and start over. I promise to never lie to you. No one will ever make me lie again!' She blurted it all out, stumbling on her words as they spilled out of her. 'You should know that I care about you, Peeta. I owe you my life.' She added to her own surprise, and she felt her cheeks get flushed. She brought her knees to her chest.

Peeta's eyes went wide and he looked down picking nervously at his double knotted shoelaces. There was so much distance between them and Peeta wondered if they would ever cross it. He looked up watching the flames glowing on her face and he was brought back to the games. She was wearing a crown of flames as they were pulled in a chariot. People were shouting their names and Peeta closed his eyes tightly, squeezing his fists, willing the memory away. Those memories tended to lead to blood, pain and screaming. The shouts died away and he was back in the quiet with only the sound of the crackling fire. Half moon marks on his palms from where his nails dug into his skin.

'I don't know if I will ever not be broken. I don't know if I can start over. But I know we protect each other. I get that now. I'm going to try. Maybe one day we'll be happy.' He mumbled and his words were strained.

'Let's get some sleep', was all she said after nodding. They rolled out the sleeping bag and with their backs to the fire closed their eyes. She could feel his back rising and falling with each breath. His broad shoulders were inches from her face. She fought the impulse to bury her face in his warm skin. She fell asleep with memories of a cave, dripping water, lips and arms. It wasn't real, she told herself.


	3. Chapter 3

In the middle of the night Katniss awoke to Peeta shaking beside her. He was whimpering and when it became more than she could take she reached around to hold him, smoothing out his damp hair and whispering softly to him. 'Shh, it's okay, it's okay, we're safe, Peeta. Shh.' His large hands reached up to cover his face and to her surprise she heard him sobbing into his hands. 'It was just a nightmare. It's okay.' She soothed. 'No, it isn't.' He said defeated. And then his arms were around her, gripping her so tightly she thought she might not be able to breathe. He clung to her like he would die if he let go.

  
'For a long time the hope of seeing you again was all that kept me alive. Then, they took that away from me. They made me hate you. I wanted to kill you. That's the worst memory I have. I relive it every night. I kill you every night even though I don't want to. They broke me.' He confessed with his face in her hair. 'How can you forgive me for that when I can't even forgive myself. I should have been stronger for you.' He was losing it, she had to bring him back.

  
'Listen to me.' She lifted his face in her hands to meet his eyes. They were so full of pain it broke her heart. And then she had no words. She cursed to herself. She never knew what to say and it frustrated her so badly she wanted to scream. So, instead, without thinking she pressed her lips forcefully to his. She felt his whole body tense in surprise. Please, don't push me away, she thought. She didn't know if she could survive being pushed away.

  
The kiss was rough at first because she had leaned in so abruptly. It was salty from tears and she realized some of them were hers. Then the kiss got more gentle as he relaxed into it. She even felt his tongue lightly skim her lips and she shivered as heat went up her spine. They parted slightly, foreheads together, breathing harshly. She smoothed his hair, getting lost in it's softness. He was looking at her expecting an explanation. She wished she had one. 'You're strong, Peeta. You've always been stronger than me. I've always been the coward. But, I'm not scared anymore. We're free and you're not broken.' She breathed heavily and laid her head in the crook of his arm as they leaned back to lay down. Peeta drifted off to sleep that night, head swimming with the knowledge that Katniss Everdeen had kissed him and it wasn't for anyone but them.

  
When dawn broke and first light made Katniss open her eyes, she sat up from Peeta's hold on her and stretched. She blushed as memories of last night came flooding back to her. `The fire had gone out in the night and she shivered now that she wasn't covered in Peeta's warmth. Peeta awoke as she was relighting the fire. She had her jacket on and warmed her hands crouching down. Peeta rubbed his eyes of sleep and straightened out his clothes, putting on his jacket. Katniss stood and grabbed her bow and arrows. 'I'm going to check the snare.' She said and then she was gone.

  
Peeta boiled up some of the river water on the fire for some tea. He was overwhelmed with embarrassment and confusion. He'd cried. He moaned to himself and roughly stoked the fire just to have something to do with his hands. Katniss was gone just long enough for Peeta to begin to get worried and he breathed a sigh of relief as she came into view. She held up a rabbit already skinned for him to see, and he smiled at the look of pride on her face. 'I've got breakfast,' she grinned.

  
They cooked the rabbit and drank the tea in a silence that was a strange mix of comfortable and unbearable. They saved the legs for lunch. They packed their bags and put out the fire. Peeta watched Katniss redo her braid. He looked away nervously when he realized he'd been staring.

  
'Ready?' She asked. He nodded and they set off down the rocky slope. The birds were singing loudly and a wind blew through the valley. The peace was overwhelming. Katniss was in front and he watched her hop from rock to rock, light as a feather, as if she wasn't carrying a thing. Peeta was more clumsy, shifting his weight with every step. A few hours later there were rapids up ahead with big boulders and smaller rocks in the river. Katniss stopped to survey the river and waited for Peeta to catch up. 'This might be it' she said as she tied the rope around her waist handing the other end to Peeta. 'I'm going to give it a try. When I get to the other side I'll signal when I'm ready for you to go.' 'Okay, be careful, it looks pretty rough.' Peeta didn't know how to swim. It looked rough even for the strongest swimmer. 'I will.'

  
Peeta tied the rope around his waist and braced himself against a rock just in case. He fed the coiled rope slowly as she made her way across. She made it look so easy it was as if he blinked and then she was signaling for him to go.

  
He gulped and climbed the first boulder. The water was moving so fast! Peeta had always had two left feet and an amputation, electrocution and hijacking hadn't exactly improved his balance. He made it across the first 2 boulders just fine, looking up now and then to watch Katniss as she slowly coiled the rope in her palms the closer he got. 'You're doing great!' she praised. 'It gets a little slippery up ahead.' He turned his attention to the rock almost immersed in the rapids and carefully traversed it hoisting himself onto the next rock. He looked up to give Katniss a wave to let her know he was doing alright when he stilled in a panic. He barely got the words of warning out. 'L..Loook out, BEHIND YOU!' but as the large Black Bear was closing in fast he feared he was too late. Peeta was only halfway across the river, there was nothing he could do but watch.


	4. Chapter 4

Years of hunting and being hunted had made Katniss' reaction time like lightning setting a tree aflame. Peeta watched her change in an instant to the Girl on Fire. She swiftly ran to the right dropping the rope and going for her bow. But the bear was too fast it was closing in on her. She had to drop into a roll to the left to avoid the swipe of its paw with huge sharp claws, narrowly escaping. She was partly in the river now, on the bank and the rope was beginning to tangle around her legs.

Peeta had begun to scramble over the rocks, unconcerned with his safety, Katniss his only concern. He slipped on a rock nearly tumbling into the fast-moving current but was able to hold on and hoist himself back up due to his upper body strength.

Katniss managed to load her bow, her hands moving with blinding speed and dexterity. Barely allowing time to aim the shot it clipped the bear on the shoulder. The bear rose up on its hind legs, towering over her, letting out a roar that made her blood run cold. It was so close she could smell its musty odor, see the saliva dripping from its jaws. She was shaking as she loaded the second arrow. She looked wide-eyed into the bear's eyes as she took her aim, expecting them to look human, like a muttation the Capitol had sent after her. They were only the eyes of a hungry animal who hadn't eaten all winter.

Peeta saw the bear rise up and knew it would only be a moment before its fatal strike so he shouted, 'Over here! Come and get me!' Using all he had to get the bear's attention. He was almost on the other side now. The bear looked his way and bellowed another roar but it was cut short and became a whimper as Katniss let loose her arrow deep into the bear's shoulder. It turned tail whimpering into the woods.

Katniss went limp in relief letting the water splash against her head. She rolled over into a kneeling position and cupped some water to wash her face. She braced herself on all fours catching her breath, her heart was pounding so fast and hard she could feel it in her throat. The locket Peeta had given her, fell out of her shirt, and hung in the water.

In an instant Peeta was at her side, strong hands checking every inch of her for wounds. He untangled the rope from her legs. 'Are you okay?!' He was out of breath, worry lines on his forehead, and pushing her wet hair out of her face. 'Yeah, I'm alright.' She assured him laying a hand on his firm bicep. He pulled her face into his chest in a protective embrace. The water lapping at their legs. She could hear his heart beating as fast as her own. She was still on fire, adrenaline pumping through her. 'I thought.. I thought I might lose you again.' His grip got tighter on her back and then he pulled her face to his and kissed her like it would be their last. It is rushed and messy, filled with longing, as if he wanted to devour all of her in one kiss. She kissed him back, melting into it, allowing him an access she never thought she could give. And it felt good. It felt hot and explosive, they kissed like they were wild, untamed creatures. Peeta let out a moan of desire. Katniss had never heard anything so intriguing in her life. It stirred a heat deep within her and made her mind so clouded she had to stop, fearful of what might happen if she didn't.

She pulled away slowly, they sat staring into each others eyes, chests heaving. Katniss bit her lip and she looked so beautiful to Peeta in that moment he'd swear his heart stopped. It was her strength that made him fall for her over and over again. Strength and power with that tiny hint of vulnerability he felt so privileged to see. His hands were on her thighs now and he gave them a light squeeze before he stood, offering his hand to help her out of the water. She took it and he didn't let go until they were at their packs on the shore. They both took long swigs of their canteens. They untied the rope from their waists, coiling it back up. Now that the adrenaline was wearing off Katniss felt a pain on her left knee. She lifted her pant leg to examine it. It was tender to the touch and a little cut up from the sharp rocks when she had dropped into a roll. 'Can you get the iodine?' He handed it to her with a concerned look. 'It's nothing, just a scrape.' She dabbed a few drops on the cut to be sure it didn't get infected.

Peeta went and found them walking sticks and she was grateful to take some of the pressure off her knee. They got moving quickly not taking time to change their damp clothes, wanting to move out of the area in case the bear got brave again. Exhaustion from stress set in quickly as they forced themselves to move on. They stopped only briefly to dine on the rabbit legs and refill their canteens, using drops of the iodine to purify it.

Katniss would steal glances at Peeta, who looked deep in thought. She wondered if he had any regrets about coming. A part of her felt like she didn't deserve him. It was selfish to take him out here, to keep him all to herself. She remembered the boy he was when she first met him. So kind and friendly. He thrived when he was in a community, would he be happy with only her for company? She had only been thinking of herself and only now realized the weight of it. She made a vow to herself to never let his light go out, no matter what it took. If she was all he had she'd make sure not to disappoint. Katniss hesitantly slipped her hand in his and offered Peeta a smile. He smiled back at her and in his bright blue eyes she saw that light.


	5. Chapter 5

That night Katniss had a dream. It was an actual dream not a nightmare. Katniss hadn't had a dream since before her father died.

Her nightmares had escalated throughout her life. First, it had been nightmares of her father's death, she would feel what she imagined he had felt in his last moments, crushing weight, air thick with coal dust and smoke, choking her until she woke panting. Then there were the nightmares of starvation, watching everyone she loved wither away before her eyes. There had been a recurring one where she had a piece of bread in her hand but someone would always snatch it away before it touched her lips. By the end of the nightmare she would be so frustrated and hungry that she would raid the kitchen half asleep. Eating just to prove she could and then the guilt would set in and she wouldn't eat for days, and the nightmares would come again in an endless cycle of hunger, defiance and guilt.

She had nightmares of the reaping, her name on a slip of paper, and then the name would fade before her eyes. It would then appear on a gravestone and next to it would be the graves of Prim and her mother who died of starvation.

She thought she had understood nightmares, gotten used to them even. Her nightmares had always been silent pain, an eerie quiet and slow terror in black and white. After the games they were loud and colorful. Screaming filled her mind so loud it drowned out thought. Color so unearthly bright she could taste it. She could even smell the blood. Nightmares of the people she had killed, their eyes hollow, rising from the dead to get their revenge on her. Of Peeta being tortured, screaming her name as they cut into him. Of Peeta killing her, hate in his eyes and a deluded smile on his face as he squeezed her throat. Of Prim's face looking back at her in her last moments and Katniss unable to move.

This dream was like the dream of a child. She laid in a meadow with Peeta smiling next to her. He was holding her hand and she felt safe. There was nothing left to fear. Color that had so often been used against her was now vibrant with beauty. The sky impossibly blue, the ground bright green sprinkled with wildflowers of every color imaginable. There was nowhere to go, nothing to do, no cares or worries. It was the same feeling she had felt as a child when her father would sing to her. When she woke, a smile graced her face, and she allowed herself a moment to hope, for the first time in so long, that her dream would come true.

She snuggled up against Peeta seeking his warmth not to drown out the nightmares like she had done so often but to enhance the dream. To prolong the feeling. He turned and laid his arm across her, sleepily leaning his head on her shoulder. The sun was rising and her face grew hot as she remembered yesterday's kiss. They hadn't spoken about it. That night they had quietly sat at the fire in their own heads. Peeta had attached his knife to the end of the walking stick. He had stripped some vines to create the lashing, working it intricately around the knife and stick until it was a spear. She had watched his hands as they worked, impressed at their artistry.

Katniss rose out of their makeshift shelter of leafy branches waking Peeta in the process. He rubbed the sleep from his eyes. Sometimes, at times like this Katniss would remember how young they are. It only lasts for a short time, the weight of hard years come back to their bodies. The scars come to the surface, always there to remind them that the harshness of the world has stolen away their innocence.

Back in District 2 Gale Hawthorn is opening a letter with his name written on it in handwriting that is unmistakably Katniss'.

_Dear Gale,_

_By the time you are reading this I am long gone. I've left District 12 and I'm asking you to please not look for me. Please honor this request. This new world is your world and we both know it isn't meant for me. You always wanted revolution and I hope you are finding your peace in its reality. I'm writing to thank you for all you have been to me. Live well. Be happy. Please check on my mother now and then if you can. Tell her I love her and that I've gone to find my happiness. It is okay for you to forget about me and move on with your life. I wish you all the best and please remember what you fought for. Don't compromise._

_Love,_

_Catnip_

He crumbles the letter in his fist, his face a contortion of grief against his hand.

'Damn it, Katniss.'


	6. Chapter 6

They had been travelling for a while that day when the weather turned on then. The wind howled loudly behind them in the valley where dark clouds were gathering. It looked to be a few hours away. They stopped short taking stock of their surroundings. 'Let's get to higher ground.' Katniss said. They picked up their pace, climbing vertically through the forest. They stopped at a small cave. It was very small, only just big enough for them and their packs, they couldn't stand inside only kneel, but it seemed sturdy enough. Katniss, armed with her knife, checked it for snakes and any other creatures that may have made it home but no evidence was found except a salamander under a rock. Peeta began to line the floor with soft leaves. 'While you do that I'm going to hunt.' When she saw the concern on Peeta's face she added, 'I won't go far.'

Katniss armed with her bow at the ready silently searched for any movements. The animals would be searching for cover from the rain like they were, time was limited. She looked up in the trees and spotted a squirrel, taking it down in one smooth motion, right in the eye. After about an hour her game bag was weighed down with 3 squirrels, 2 chipmunks, and a large amount of ramps (wild leeks) she dug up.

She sat to skin them, working quickly as the wind was picking up, the tops of the trees swaying above her. She was almost finished when she sensed movement to her right. Bow drawn she looked into the face of a red fox warily eyeing her from behind a tree. She was about to let her arrow fly when memories of foxface flooded into her awareness. She couldn't do it. Instead, she cut off a piece of one of the chipmunks and threw it in the fox's direction.

The fox scurried back a few yards in surprise before curiously approaching the offering. Then, in a flash, the meat was in its teeth as it quickly departed into the woods. Katniss sighed sadly. She made quick work of the rest and headed back to Peeta.

When Katniss arrived back at camp she was pleasantly surprised at what Peeta had accomplished. There was a nice think padding of leaves inside with the sleeping bag laid over it. He had a small fire going near the entrance where some rock jutted out that would hopefully shield it from most of the rain. He also had a decent pile of firewood stacked as well. 'I checked for any holes in the rock and filled them best I could.' He said casually. 'Did you find anything?' She showed him her bounty.

Soon after, the wind picked up even more and they heard thunder in the distance. They crawled inside and began to roast the meats over the fire. Suddenly, the rain came all at once. The sky was so dark it felt like dusk instead of midafternoon.

They were sitting across from each other in boredom when Peeta made a suggestion. 'Want to play a game?'

Katniss scoffed, 'What kind of game could we play cooped up in here?'

'There are lots. You never played any games with your friends?'

Katniss looked down at her shoes. 'I guess I was busy.'

Peeta was reminded of how different their lives had been. While he was playing games with his friends in his warm house on winter nights, Katniss was working hard to survive.

'Well, there's two truths and a lie, where you reveal three things about yourself but one of them is a lie and the other person has to guess which one isn't true. Or, Never have I ever, where you say something you've never done, like "Never have I ever been arrested", and the other has to admit if they've done it or not. We usually played that one where you had to strip if you have done it.' Peeta laughed, but when he saw the look of shock on her face he added. 'But we don't have to play it like that.'

Katniss was hesitant but also excited. Her competitive side won out as she thought about Peeta having to undress as she outwitted him. 'We can play Never have I ever, the real way.'

Peeta was surprised, he knew about her modesty, and when he had suggested it he hadn't even let himself think that she would do it. His cheeks flushed and he stumbled over his words. Which Katniss took pleasure in. 'A..Are you s..sure?'

She had a smug grin on her face, 'Yeah, what are you scared? It's your game.'

Peeta composed himself, trying not to think about what it was impossible not to think of. Katniss naked. 'No way. Let's raise the stakes. How about we can stop any time but the person who chooses to stop loses and has to do one thing of the winner's choosing.'

A moment of consideration. 'Deal. Who goes first?'

'You pick.' Peeta ever the gentleman.

'Ok. Then I will.' She took a moment to think. 'Never have I ever played two truths and a lie.'

'You play dirty.' Peeta laughed as he took off his jacket. He threw more wood on the fire. 'It will be over pretty fast if we only choose what we know the other person has done. Never have I ever kissed someone and regret it now.' Katniss didn't take anything off. Peeta raised an eyebrow.

'Fine, Never have I ever shoplifted.' Peeta took off his boots. 'No way, spill it.' Katniss begged.

Peeta refused to explain. 'Never have I ever held a snake.' Katniss removed her boots. 'That's a story I'd like to hear.'

'You will once I've heard about the shoplifting. Never have I ever forgotten someone's birthday.' Peeta took off his socks.

'Aw, come on. Mine is embarrassing and yours is awesome. No comparison. Never have I ever been given flowers by a guy.' Katniss didn't remove anything. 'Now that's just not right.'

Katniss shrugged. 'Never have I ever done more than kiss someone.' Peeta took off his belt.

'Never have I ever yelled at a teacher.' Katniss took off her socks. Peeta grinned.

'Never have I ever wanted to have kids.' Peeta reached behind his back and took his shirt over his head. His skin was smooth looking with scars randomly placed and his chest had soft looking blonde hairs on it.

'Never have I ever had a pet.' Katniss slowly took off her jacket.

'Never have I ever played an instrument.' Peeta unzipped his pants and pulled them off so he was now only in his boxers. He wrapped his arms around himself to keep warm and Katniss couldn't look away from the way the firelight licked his biceps displaying the strength of his arms.

'I play the flute. Never have I ever rolled down a hill.' Katniss took off her belt.

'You should try it, it's fun. Never have I ever had sex.' The question had tugged at her until she'd finally asked. It hung in the air between them and Peeta didn't take anything off.

'Never have I ever gotten detention.' Katniss frowned and unbuttoned her shirt slowly shrugging it off. Her bra was black and plain, a delicate version of a sports bra. Her stomach was flat and trim, the color of honey. Peeta thought she was perfect.

'Never have I ever failed a test.' Peeta shook his head.

'Never have I ever smoked tobacco.' Katniss sighed and unbuttoned her pants revealing her long thin hairy legs. She wore black boy shorts. Their scars were now laid bare to each other and each felt a little self-conscious. Peeta had never been phased by his nudity but since the marring of his body he felt unsure now that it was Katniss looking at him.

'Never have I ever written a love letter.' Peeta hooked his thumbs in the waist of his boxers making to remove them.

'Wait, stop! Okay, Okay, you win.' Peeta stopped with a huge grin on his face.

'Are you sure about that? If you lose you have to do whatever I say.' Katniss had her hands over her eyes.

'I'm sure.' Peeta was laughing at her. 'It's not funny!' She grabbed his shirt and threw it at his face, but couldn't help laughing a little herself. Peeta ducked to the right a little still laughing. 'You knew you'd win either way! This game was rigged!' She was getting a little angry that Peeta thought he could outsmart her and chose to intimidate him. She leaned in close to his face and Peeta's smile faded. 'So what is it? What do you want me to do?' She snarled. Thunder clapped loudly around them.

Katniss was leaning in so close to Peeta and he was overly aware that she was leaning between his legs and they were only in their underwear. Katniss seemed to realize it too because she leaned her back against the rock again and started pulling on her pants. Peeta put his hand on hers, stilling her movement. 'You're so beautiful.' he breathed looking her straight in the eye.

'No I'm not.' Peeta nodded his head. 'Yes, you are. Remember, no more lies. Can I kiss you, Katniss?' Katniss bit her lip and nodded. Peeta trailed his fingers up her thigh, scooping her behind her back and pulling her to him. His other hand went behind her head, tangled in her braid. 'So beautiful.' She heard him mumble against her lips. Then they were kissing slowly and sweetly. 'Is this real?' He parted to ask hazily. Katniss nodded, 'Yes, it's real, Peeta.'

Peeta's hand trailed circles on Katniss' bare lower back making her shiver slightly. His hands were rough and but his movements gentle. They kissed again and again each one becoming more bold. She let his tongue pass through her lips, swiping against hers so slowly it was almost cruel. Peeta left her wanting, mouth open, as he kissed a light trail of kisses down her chin to her neck. She whimpered, wanting more than just these excruciatingly soft kisses and gripped tight to his neck and arm, pulling him closer. Peeta offered a light sucking where her neck met her shoulder. He let out a loud breath stopping when she moaned, leaning her away from him. 'We should stop.' Peeta said, shifting his legs away from her and placing his pants in his lap.

Katniss was completely offended. 'Fine.'

Peeta saw the hurt on her face and quickly explained himself. 'It's just... I want to take it slow. I want to do this right, you know? You deserve that.'

Her features softened. 'Okay.' She conceded, curious at what doing it right entailed. She didn't ask though. Instead they dressed and ate, listening to the storm. That night Peeta gave her a soft chaste kiss goodnight and fought the toughest internal struggle of his entire life. His last thoughts before he went to sleep were that it was easier to stop himself from killing her in a hijacked haze.


	7. Chapter 7

Peeta woke first, stretching out his leg which had cramped in the small space. The rain was still coming down but it had lessened in intensity. He restarted the fire to chase away the damp air. Everything felt wet, it was a miserable feeling. He stepped out into the rain needing to stand and walk for a bit. It was truly a dreary day, one of those days where you wake up tired because of the pressure in the air. The ground was muddy and everything was dirty. Peeta caught some rain water and put it on the fire to make some tea to raise their spirits. Katniss woke grumpy. Being in the cave had brought up painful memories. Her frown lifted a little when Peeta handed her some tea. They sat close to the fire with the sleeping bag around their backs. Ate and drank more tea.

Toward evening the rain had still not relented and they were getting more grumpy by the minute. She had already snapped at Peeta twice over the stupidest things. Eventually, they stopped talking altogether. Every minute brought on more anxiety. She couldn't avoid getting lost in her thoughts, none of them good. Regret tugged at her nerves and fear made her chest feel tight. If they died out here no one would ever know. What if one of them died and left the other alone? Would Peeta survive without her? Could she? How long would they do this? Would they go back to Panem, tails between their legs? That thought triggered her to take out the map because she'd rather die than go back to Panem. She poured over it looking at the path they had travelled so far and estimating where they were. The map was a teaching tool to show how the land had changed and Panem was born. They were only about 20 miles south of District 12 because of so many delays.

'Katniss.' Peeta interrupted her thoughts, she looked up sternly. 'The rain stopped.' He smiled while he stuck his hand outside feeling for raindrops.

The relief was palpable. With luck, tomorrow they could start moving again and Katniss could stop thinking about things she didn't know.

The next morning they took turns bathing on the side of the river. Katniss let out a sigh of pleasure as she took off the damp clothes. Every few minutes she glanced at the treeline to make sure she wasn't being watched.

With fresh clothes on and the warm sun beating down on them they packed up and began to hike. The light of day made Katniss feel sheepish about her behavior the day before. 'I'm sorry I was so mean yesterday. I didn't mean it. You're not hopeless, complete opposite actually. I don't know why I do that.' Katniss was never one for self-reflection but she knew when she was lashing out inappropriately.

Peeta eyed her warily as if deciding something. 'I know. It's alright.' He paused and then decided to continue cryptically. 'I know why you do. I know you better than you think.'

Katniss stopped mid-stride turning to scowl at the boy next to her but her features softened as she took a good long look. He looked tired but determined. He held his spear tightly in his fist. Some stubble was forming on his jaw and his hair was entirely left to nature's whims. When she reached his eyes, locked upon her, she was undone. Those eyes were peering into the depths of her soul and she knew he was not mistaken. In that moment, Katniss realized she was looking at a man.

She swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat. 'Why did you come with me?'

His response was immediate and slightly playful though the situation hardly called for it. 'Don't you know by now, Katniss? I would follow you anywhere. To the ends of the Earth, which I suspect is where you're taking me.' He laughed a little, as if it was so obvious she'd been a fool not to see it.

The tears came streaming down her face before she even realized she was crying. She broke down, literally falling to her knees because she couldn't hold herself up. Peeta was at her side in an instant. He didn't say anything though, just smoothed her hair lovingly and let her cry it out. She gripped his shirt in her fists, howling so painfully she thought her grief might kill her.

Every moment she had spent with Peeta in her entire life flashed before her eyes, it struck her so hard she couldn't breathe. Every sacrifice he had ever made for her. Every time she had pushed him away. Every smile he had given her. All the kisses, words and touches they had shared. How it had felt when she thought she lost him. Her heart had hardened through her life and now it was like a cracked coconut, spilling out the sweetness that had been hidden for so long. 'I've been horrible to you!' she wailed. 'I'm so sorry, so so sorry.' Her arms found his neck and she hugged him tightly.

It was hard to see her this way. He held her like something precious under his protection. Assuring her in soft words that everything is okay.

You love him! The realization hits her like a punch in the gut. It's too much to take. She loves him so much it's terrifying. Then, on top of the fear she is mortified as she self-consciously realizes how hysterical she is being. The urge to run is over-powering, so that's what she does.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Herein lies adult content.

'Hey you, cat up a tree! Come on down.' Peeta was trying to persuade Katniss out of the tree she had quickly scaled after running out of his arms. She'd been up there for at least 15 minutes trying to compose herself and come to terms with her discovery. He was nervously pacing beneath her limb, swiping his hand now and then through his golden locks.

Katniss curled up against the trunk, knees to her chest, trying to focus on her breathing. Breathe in, hold, exhale. Breathe in, hold 1...2.., exhale. At least, she had stopped crying _. My name is Katniss Everdeen. I am eighteen years old. Prim is dead. I'm still alive. I ran away from District 12. Peeta came with me. I love Peeta Mellark..._

Peeta was inwardly berating his open nature. It had gotten him in trouble all his life. Even the beatings from his mother hadn't smacked it out of him. Wearing his heart on his sleeve had only ever caused him pain but it was the only way he could exist now. Honesty was the only thing that ensured he remained in tact. The lies he had been forced to tell had taken away from him bit by bit, wearing him down to where he didn't know what was real or not real. He had come to understand the meaning behind the adage, "The truth shall set you free".

'I didn't mean to upset you. Please, come down. We don't have to talk about it unless you want to.'

Katniss peeked around her knees to look down at him. How could she face him!? He would see right through her. She knew he would. Nothing would be the same. She didn't know how to love someone. Everyone she had ever loved was damaged beyond repair. Peeta included. And this was a different love now, a deeper, stronger bond than she had ever known. One she knew she couldn't survive if she lost it. She had always been her father's daughter but now she saw her mother inside of her. A weakness she had always despised.

Then, she took a deeper look at her life. Love had never been about survival for her. That was Gale's interpretation of her. Love for her had been sacrifice. If she was really concerned about self-preservation she never would have volunteered in the games. Wouldn't have risked the berries. Told Haymitch to save Peeta instead of her. Surviving without love was the real fear, it was why she was always so willing to sacrifice herself. Living without allowing yourself to love, is not living at all. 'I'm coming down.'

When she touched the ground, Peeta kept his distance trying to gauge her mood. Katniss approached him slowly, her hands were shaking, but she reached them out to take both of his hands in hers. When they touched, his warmth stilled her nervousness and calmed her. She had to tell him before she lost her nerve. It was so loud in her head it would be impossible not to voice it.

'I'm sorry about my behavior. It's just... I realized something that I didn't understand at first but now is very, very clear.' She looked deep into the blue of his eyes, lifting her hand to pet his jaw. He watched her intently, waiting patiently. 'I'm in love with you. I think I have been for a long time.' She let it out, in awe of herself, searching his expression. A contented and blissful smile graced his face that reached his eyes.

Peeta wanted to joke about her finally catching up but he knew how hard this was for her so instead he leaned in placing a soft kiss on her lips, taking her face in his hands. He spoke against her lips. 'I thought I was in love with you the first time I saw you. It can't hold a candle to how I feel now. I love you. I love you so much I'm consumed by it and sometimes I become nothing but my love for you.'

They kiss deeply, allowing the sensations to bathe them. They melt into each other. Her right leg lifting off the ground behind her unconsciously because she feels so light she is sure she could float away. The world is brighter. The air cleaner. Everything around her seems to sing as if the woods have fallen in love as she has. She laughs with her whole body. 'I love Peeta Mellark!' She shouts loudly so the whole valley can hear her. It echoes back to them as if the world agrees. 'I love Katniss Everdeen!' Everdeen...Everdeen... They break into a fit of laughter again. Smiling until their faces ache. How ironic that the world had once begged to hear them pronounce their love and when they finally did, only the woods were there to listen.

All the walls they had ever built between them out of fear or misunderstanding crumbled to dust as the truth came to light. Their motives once veiled behind flimsy excuses were no longer hidden to themselves or each other. The day Peeta had dreamed about for years had finally come and he didn't have to wonder if it was real. He just had to look at her face to know. He nuzzled her neck below her ear, breathing in her scent. She tilted her head back and he latched onto her neck spreading kisses everywhere he could.

His stubble scratched at the sensitive skin of her neck in a way that sent thrills through her body. Her pulse was racing as she felt a wetness pool between her legs. She wanted him more than she'd ever wanted anything in her life. Needing to feel more of his skin against her she pulls off his shirt and he pulls off hers. When she feels his stomach against hers she is sure nothing has ever felt so good but she wants even more. Peeta lays her on the soft earth, with his legs on either side of her, he pulls her bra down slowly to release her breasts. Both hands palm them, caressing until he leans in taking one into his mouth. She moans loudly. 'Ooh, that feels so good.' He grins around her nipple, licking and sucking as if he will devour her. Her hips buck up against him and he leaves her other breast bare as he trails his fingers down her stomach leaving goosebumps in its wake. His hand slips slightly into her pants, playing with her curls. The sensations are too much, she's strung taut like a bow, ready to beg for release. 'Please, Peeta!'

He tugs her pants and underwear down to her ankles at her encouragement. He is between her legs now, smiling up at her. He trails kisses up the inside of her thigh, breathing hotly. 'Oh!' She exclaims as she realizes what is happening. His lips and tongue only touch her for a moment, his stubble scratches the knot of nerves lightly and that's all it takes for her body to fly with uncontrollable pleasure as her orgasm courses through her with his name on her lips. She lays limply in ecstasy and he lies beside her kissing her shoulder. She turns to look at him a lazy smile on her face. He smiles back looking utterly smitten. She starts to move to return the favor but he stops her with soft kisses to her palms. 'Not yet.' He says, 'I couldn't help myself, I've wanted to do that for so long. We have plenty of time.'

They lay on the forest floor for a long while looking up at the sky and at each other. Completely content and uncommonly happy.

**Author's Note:**

> Eventually this story will have some violence and sexuality so I marked it explicit. This is my first fanfic! So comments and feedback are loved and appreciated.


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